There are stranger things in this world than even I could imagine. Dreamt of fallen stars and blueberry bushes and awoke to find my body transformed into an arrangement of vegetables. The cold wind of death has blown upon me, I sense danger in every step.
Dined with the Morning Star in his palace high above the plains of hell. His choice of wine is as always exceptional although his 'corpse finger trifle' left something to be desired. We talked at great length about his ongoing feud with Solomon the caretaker of the Moon whom he mistakenly believes to have started a rumor regarding wooden teeth and the Centenary Spider,I know he is mistaken as the rumor was started by me. He is an extremely stupid and unpleasant man.
I drank wine beneath the world's tree today,It was there I met a group of wasps dining on honey and flower petals. We lit a bonfire and sang ancient insect ballads. They later told me stories of the great wasp kings who shaped the world into the place we know it as today.
I spent the day exploring the ever expanding gardens which occasionally surround my home. I walked among the ancient statues and strange follies while the voices of a thousand public school boys, long dead whispered vague threats and obscenities in my ear.
I have fallen in love with the ghost of a dead sparrow, she is called Emily and she died in France sometime during the Revolution. She is effortlessly beautiful in a way that only a dead french sparrow can be. She gives me a warm and shimmering glow inside, in return I give her worms.
Began to talk openly about my fear of clocks. I walked silently through the rain as the limbless casualties of both world wars looked on, bowing their heads as I passed. I ate my sandwiches in an abandoned railway station raised into the air by the cemented robotic butlers of the Russian Tsars.
I was chased through an empty field by the ghosts of the Black and White Minstrels today.Some of them were shrieking in strange in strange high pitched voices while others sang 'Old Man River' while they ran. I only escaped with the help of the fantastic Mr Fox who led me to a disused subway where I hid until they passed.
I awake within a giant warehouse which seems to have been abandoned for some time. The walls extend in all directions, seemingly forever. Every now and then I catch sight of something or someone racing between the pillars. On the ground are boxes filled with 14th century royal wedding mugs. Upon each pillar hangs a grotesque clay face, under each face is printed the word 'Regret',some faces appear to be crying.Out of the corner of my eye I see and old woman dressed in a blue apron and hairnet, she is sitting at a sowing machine, softly humming a song I do not know.
Met with the grand council of Spiders who reside among the great drainage systems to the north. They believe the time of the Great Spider has come and that the old world will soon be buried beneath cobwebs, this sounds suspiciously similar to what the council of cockroaches told me last year.
I awoke to find myself gazing at a strange landscape,odd creatures with long necks stroll among the distant trees swatting at the occasional bird which happens upon their way, far away green lights drift aimlessly upon the horizon. As I look down I realize that someone has stolen my shoes.I cannot remember who